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Make life easier for Elementary School Children with disabilities

‘’Think About It” challenges may begin to cause problems in school.

Warning signs your child may be having trouble:

  • Unable to do two things at once.
  • Unable to ‘listen and look’ or ‘listen and do’ at the same time.
  • May not be developmentally ready to sit still and / or pay attention.
  • May often feel overwhelmed, anger or / and frustrated.
  • May still throw temper tantrums.
  • May refuse to do certain things.
  • May struggle academically falling further and further behind.
  • Unable to make or keep friends.

What can you do to help your child in school?

  1. Teach in small steps.
    • Repeat steps learned everyday.
    • Add new steps very slowly.
  2. Encourage the child as they struggle.
    • Go back to learned skills when child is overwhelmed
    • Praise child for what they already can do.
  3. Get to know your child’s teacher, coaches, and other important adults.
  4. Teach your child gestures to help understand directions.
  5. Get involved.
    • Find out what your child is learning at school.
      • Practice what they are doing at school at home with your child.
      • Ask the teacher for ideas to practice life skills.
    • Use daily notebook, phone or email with the teacher to stay in contact.
    • Offer to volunteer at school, scouts, church, sports.

Elementary child with Neuro-developmental differences may:

  1. Continue to grow slowly.
    • Appear malnourished even though they have a good diet.
    • Suddenly gain weight and enter into puberty at a very early age. Be prepared.
  2. Look normal and are mistaken as spoiled when they are doing the best they can.
  3. Have super word usage and appear very put together and intelligent.
    • People expect more of them than they are able to give.
  4. Have trouble ‘fitting in’ and making friends.
    • Play with younger children or adults.
    • Other children may use them as a ‘pawn’ to get their own needs met.
    • Get involved in dangerous activities to please another child.
  5. Have difficulty following the rules.
    • Know the rules, but cannot apply them.
  6. Have impulsive behavior
    • No common sense.
    • Does something without thinking.
    • Lack understanding of actions and consequences.
    • Do not learn from experience.
    • Can not process what is asked (not disobeying you).
  7. Have mood swings due to brain injury.
  8. Have sensory issues.
    • Get hurt and not know it.
    • Be lightly touched and scream.
  9. Mix up fact and fantasy.
  10. Say things they don’t mean to say.
    • Child may think by talking and have no internal voice.
    • Forget what she/he said in the last sentence.
  11. Appear withdrawn, silent or shut down to process or need time away when overstimulated or emotional.

Tips to help your elementary age child with "differences" cope

  1. Tell your child about their disability in simple language.
  2. Accept behavior due to brain damage.
    • Do not accept ‘brat’ behavior.
    • Learn to know the difference.
  3. Provide a daily routine.
    • Get plenty of sleep.
    • Naps after school may be needed.
  4. Provide positive attention to the child.
  5. Tell the child what you want done rather than what you don’t want them to do.
  6. Make sure your child gets good nutrition.
  7. Take care of yourself.

Personal belongings

  • Clearly define your child’s space and belongings.
  • Keep room simple and uncluttered.
    • Places for child’s clothes, toys, etc. easy to put away.
  • Teach child to ‘ask’ before taking anything.
  • Do not send money to school with the child. Deliver it yourself.

Dealing with behaviors

  1. Teach your child to ‘return’ anything they ‘find’.
    • Have child face ‘victim’ of stolen goods.
    • If a child ‘finds’ something that is not his/hers ask who, what, where, when or how. Not why.
    • Make sure child knows what they own.
  2. Teach child what to do when their body hurts.
  3. Disobedience may be ‘forgetfulness’ or not being able to process what was asked.
  4. Teach one social skill at a time and build on that one.
  5. Control your own emotions.
  6. Learn signs of your child getting out of control.
    • Teach child to read these signs.
    • Provide hand gestures to alert child when things may be getting out of control.
    • Encourage child to maintain control.
    • Wait to discuss until child is settled and can think if child is acting out.
  7. Have child help fix or pay for what is broken.

Friends

  1. Meet child’s friends and parents.
    • Tell them about your child's disability
    • Tell them how to best work with your child.
  2. Limit media.
    • Can be over stimulating.
    • Child can have difficulty not knowing fact from fantasy.
  3. Supervise.
    • Child may be easily influenced by others who recognize vulnerability. Follows or is set up.
  4. Teach friendship skills.
    • Child may act very silly or behave strangely to get attention from peers.
    • Child may act just like ‘friend’ they are with – chameleon.
  5. Designate a friend or relative who will:
    • Provide a safe house.
    • Be a mentor.
    • Provide an activity once every six weeks or less – zoo, walk, sport event, school project help.

Safety

  1. Limit choices.
  2. Teach stranger danger.
    • Can not separate friend from enemy.
  3. Teach skills.
    • Slowly.
    • In many environments (cross street at many corners, ride bike with parents).
    • Provide ‘real’ life experiences where the child can grow, but with an available safety net.

Family

  1. Find things your child can do that child can be proud.
  2. Make meal times a time to enjoy.
    • Focus on only one table manner at a time. Make sure child can do it. For example: some mouth breathers are afraid of to close their think while chewing because they are afraid they will die.
    • Let child get up and fetch forgotten items – salt, milk, etc.
    • Consider letting child come last to table and leave first.
  3. Teach how to do household chores well.
    • It is better to do a little bit right than do many chores poorly.
  4. Give responsibilities child can manage successfully.
  5. Give your child only as much freedom as can be handled successfully.
  6. Provide healthy, wholesome touch.
  7. Provide volunteer family experiences that show child that choices can make a difference in your life – soup kitchens, homeless shelters.

Activities

  1. Find wholesome, life building, character building activities for child to do in place of media.
    • Care for animals.
    • Help a neighbor.
    • Find ways for your child to succeed (hobby, craft, sport).
  2. Go on nature walks – taste the air, smell the smells, feel their movement.
    • Use silence to hear and see and focus on things we don’t usually notice.
  3. Have need for active fun
    • Running.
    • Jumping.
    • Climbing.
    • High energy movement.
  4. Provide supervised activities:
    • At your home for friends
      • Basketball hoop.
      • Tree house.
      • Hot tub.
      • Sleepovers.
      • Roller blade.
      • Biking.
      • Skateboards.
      • Playing.
      • Running.
      • Swimming.
    • Find group activities your child can participate in and be accepted
      • Scouts.
      • Choir.
      • Church group.
      • Band.
      • Big Brother or Big Sister.
      • Karate/martial arts
      • Teach activity leader/coach about your child's disability
      • Consider providing the person with a Care Kit

Emotions

  1. Realize there is only so much stimulation a child can take in before they go out of control.
    • Change the atmosphere with gentle music or silence (rock, hip-hop and rap can agitate a child).
  2. Practice acceptable ways of dealing with feelings.
  3. Listen to your child’s fears or sadness.
  4. Teasing is common at this age.
    • You will need to be there to help your child deal with teasing.
  5. Notice good qualities and remind child of them. They may forget.